The Surrogate Mother’s Guide
The average cost of a surrogate is $60,000 to $80,000 USD for a typical U.S. journey; that’s nearly one-third of your total surrogacy budget. Overseas, surrogates are paid almost the same but adjusted for the cost of living. That’s about $15,000 to $17,000 USD on average. Total surrogate pay can be separated into “Base Pay” and “Benefits”.
A typical surrogate in the United States makes from $50,000 to $60,000 paid in monthly installments. She also gets paid another $5,000 to $10,000 USD in various benefits. Surrogates with unique qualifications (such as living in California or having previous experience) often receive an additional $10,000 or more.
In comparison a new elementary teacher is paid just $45,000 USD per year, according to PayScale.com. Surrogates also demand a lot of extras, including clothes, transportation, lost wages, household expenses, and more.
But aside from financial rewards, many women experience great satisfaction from helping childless couples. That makes being a surrogate a meaningful alternative to other forms of less-skilled or part-time work. While this article reviews your surrogate’s monetary expenses, it’s important to keep in mind the non-financial benefits that she provides and requires!
Surrogates overseas typically earn the same as their U.S. counterparts, but differences in cost of living, costs of medical care, and legal expenses, make surrogate costs much more affordable for Western couples.
A surrogacy agent may tell you that compensation is just $45,000 USD, but you also need to calculate the cost of benefits. Benefits are not optional — some are required by law, and others have become expected expenses. All are required if you want to make a competitive offer to your surrogate (and not have her reject your offer and look for other Intended Parents).
The list below is a common benefits package offered to a surrogate. These benefits are not optional in a competitive contract, but the amounts may be negotiated.
To understand your own costs, check out this article about Medical Insurance for your Surrogate in the Surrogacy Cost Guide.
Bonuses/Gifts: While not mandatory, many parents like to offer a ‘signing bonus’ of $1,500 USD to entice their surrogate to come work with them. This doesn’t necessarily have to be a cash payment — bonuses can take the form of gifts, wellness packages, monthly spa treatments, and other types of gifts that make being pregnant a little easier to endure.
An average surrogate overseas costs about $15,000, which is the equivalent of about $45,000 USD in the United States when adjusted for the local cost of living.
According the United States Consumer Prices Index (Including Rent)…
Similar figures are available for all our overseas destinations, where cost of living is much lower than in the US.
In addition, a surrogate overseas receives a housing stipend, medical care, food, transportation expenses, and other benefits as part of her agreement. When all expenses are included, the overseas surrogate is often equally compensated as her US counterpart.
Make the cost of living comparison yourself, and you can see that finding a surrogate overseas can be an affordable option to start your family abroad, but also often provides a unique opportunity for the surrogate.
Being a surrogate for a friend or family member is a special act of generosity, but that gift comes with a price tag. Even if you hire a friend to carry your pregnancy, there are still costs you should expect. These are costs that your friend initially may pay out of her own pocket. As the Intended Parent, your obligation is to reimburse her for all of these expenses.
The total cost of being a surrogate depends on the personal situation of your friend or family member. Here’s a summary:
Not all insurance policies cover maternity care, and those that do, often exclude surrogacy pregnancies. If your friend’s insurance will cover a surrogate pregnancy, then you are in good shape.
The typical insurance will cover all of the prenatal care, including office visits, ultrasound exams, and (eventually) the delivery. Complications and non-standard treatments may be extra, usually with a hefty deductible or co-payment.
Most insurance policies will include some co-payment or deductible. The amount you or your surrogate/friend will have to pay depends on the policy. Some policies ask her to pay a co-payment of $25 to $50 for each prenatal visit to her obstetrician. Others have a deductible and won’t pay anything until she has paid at least $5000 out of her own pocket first. To understand the total costs, you should talk with the insurance provider.
Obviously the Intended Parents should pay any deductible or co-payment. In the commercial surrogacy world, it’s common for the Intended Parents to pay for the surrogate’s health insurance premiums while she is pregnant (since they are the ones taking advantage of that service). You should offer to pay the full insurance premiums, but if your friend’s insurance also covers her entire family (and a lot of non-pregnancy treatments) then you may agree to pay a portion of the costs. Even if your friend would pay for the insurance premium anyway, you should still chip in given the effort she are making for your — perhaps to pay just half the insurance premiums.
You also need to find an obstetrician to care for your surrogate/friend during the pregnancy. Maybe her current OBGYN can manage this, or she may refer you to a good obstetrician if she can’t. The chosen obstetrician should have treatment privileges at a local hospital –and that is probably where your friend will deliver the baby. Check with both the doctor and the hospital if they will accept the health insurance. If not, you may need to find another doctor or hospital. There’s a full discussion about the surrogate’s compensation and benefits in the Surrogacy Guide.
Other than the prenatal care and delivery, there are some additional expenses you should be aware of. Most official surrogacy contracts will include these fees as “out of pocket” expenses. They include:
If you’re lucky enough to have a friend as your surrogate, you can discuss these possible costs in a friendly conversation. But the final recommendation is the most important… It’s critical that all these agreements are written down so that there is no confusion or misunderstanding during the pregnancy.
Regardless of the personal relationship between the Surrogate and the Intended Parents, every surrogate should sign a simple Surrogacy Agreement.
The Surrogacy Agreement should make clear what will be your surrogate-friend’s future relationship to the child. She will not be the legal mother, but will the baby know the role she played in its birth? Will she be the “Cool Aunt” or just a friend of the family? Will she get to visit the child regularly? What are the limits? What if the family moves away, can she still come visit?
The Surrogacy Agreement will also manage expectations about the pregnancy itself. Will you insist that your surrogate/friend changes her diet (no more tuna sandwiches or packaged lunch meats!)? Will they object if she travels on an airplane during the final trimester? What if your friend wants to go to Mexico or the Florida Keys where Zika mosquitoes still persist? Will she be comfortable with both parents in the delivery room… with a camera? Will you want your friend to breastfeed (which can be problematic, by the way).
A Surrogacy Agreement is a bit like a prenuptial agreement — nobody thinks it will be necessary, and in most cases it may not be. But if it becomes necessary, it is REALLY necessary! The Agreement forces everyone to put all of their expectations out on the table. It protects against misunderstandings that can devastate a friendship. There are many examples of entire families torn apart over the very emotional topic of a baby. It would be a shame to see such an act of love and generosity have such a painful final result.
It’s always better to be safe than sorry
If you don’t want to spend an exorbitant fee to a surrogacy agency, you can look for your own surrogate online. The most popular places are dedicated groups on Facebook and similar social networks. You can find a list of groups just by searching with the keyword “Surrogate”. But manage your expectations– there are far more parents looking for surrogates than vice versa. Be prepared for a long wait, and make special efforts to “sell yourself” to surrogate candidates who are often approached by many parents.
Other strategies include looking locally using traditional advertising methods. One of my clients found a surrogate by posting a flier at the local grocery store.
When looking for a surrogate be careful… Many times women in social groups are available because they don’t meet the minimum criteria needed to be matched by a professional agency. They may live in state that is not “surrogacy-friendly”, or maybe they’ve been rejected by agencies for health issues. You should compare each surrogate candidate that replies to your search against this list of surrogate qualifications.
If you continue to have problems finding a surrogate, but still want to steer clear of an agency, you can hire a surrogate recruiter directly. There are freelance recruiters who support Independent Surrogacy journeys. (As an example, Sensible’s own Indy Baby program includes an independent surrogacy recruiter who can find your surrogate for a modest fee.) Once you find your surrogate, you can work with her directly or hire other freelance service providers to assist with the rest of your journey.
Surrogate recruiters may charge from $6,000 to $10,000 to find a qualified surrogate. In addition, the matching process also includes costs for medical, psychological and legal clearances. Here is a quick summary of the costs for your surrogate.
Your surrogate will comprise about one-half of your total surrogacy budget. In the US, that’s $50,000 to $60,000 for a typical journey. Overseas, surrogates are paid about $13,000 to $16,000. A surrogate’s total compensation consists of her base pay, benefits and medical insurance expenses.
Surrogates earn a pay in the U.S. of about $50,000 to $60,000 for a typical journey, but that figure depends on her specific qualifications. Repeat surrogates (who have previously completed a journey) will ask about $10,000 extra. Surrogates in high-demand areas (like California or New England) often charge up to $13,000 more. Surrogates with their own health insurance will also ask about $5,000 extra. A full detail of your surrogate’s budget is shown in SENSIBLE’s Surrogacy Guide.
All surrogates are entitled to about $10,000 in various benefits. Some are absolutely required while others are nice incentives to help recruit a great candidate. Required benefits include payments whenever she starts fertility treatments or undergoes an invasive procedure. Surrogates will need extra money for maternity clothes and travel expenses. A nice incentive would be wellness sessions or other perks to make pregnancy more manageable. A full list of benefits and costs is available in the SENSIBLE’s Surrogacy Guide.
Most potential surrogates don’t have insurance that will include maternity care. For those with insurance, most policies include co-payments and deductibles of $5000 or more. The cost of an insurance policy will add $7,000 to $10,000 to your surrogate’s compensation. Details are available in SENSIBLE’s Total Surrogacy Cost Guide.
You can find your surrogate without an agency and save about $20,000 in Agency Fees. The most popular sources are dedicated groups on Facebook and similar social networks. Freelance surrogate recruiters (like SENSIBLE’s) can find a surrogate for a fraction of a surrogacy agency. Contact us for details.
It’s not easy to become a surrogate. Every surrogate must have had her own successful pregnancy, be financially self-supportive, have a healthy lifestyle, live in a ‘surrogacy friendly’ jurisdiction, and pass strict medical and psychological evaluations. The complete list is available in SENSIBLE’s free Surrogacy Guide.
Surrogates are required to undergo several medical tests and procedures plus take fertility medications throughout the process. Because their health is so central to a successful journey, it is closely monitored throughout the entire surrogacy process. But there are also psychological evaluations, interviews with the Intended Parents, and complex legal agreements. The complete requirements are available in SENSIBLE’s free Surrogacy Guide.
Bill Houghton is the founder of Sensible Surrogacy, author of the Sensible Surrogacy Guide, 2x surrogacy dad, and a dedicated advocate for secure, legal and ethical Gestational Surrogacy. Read Bill's Biography
Bill Houghton is the founder of Sensible Surrogacy, author of the Sensible Surrogacy Guide, 2x surrogacy dad, and a dedicated advocate for secure, legal and ethical Gestational Surrogacy. Read Bill's Biography
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PLEASE NOTE: Information on this website is based on personal experience gained over many years of assisting infertile couples. My comments are intended as a Guide for those in need, but should not be mistaken for professional medical advise. Any medical questions should ALWAYS be referred to a credentialed medical specialist before beginning any treatment. Sensible Surrogacy or Exceptional Stork accepts no liability for medical procedures undertaken without the consult of an accredited clinic or physician.
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